Remy: Why I Don’t Believe In Peaking

“Oh yeah, they definitely peaked in high school.” I’ve heard variations of this sentence all too many times. Whether people are using this term in regards to themselves or others, it is almost always used disparagingly.

People throw around the term “peaking” in reference to an individual or group of people who have reached their prime in some sort of activity or phase of life.

I do not believe this is an actual phenomenon. Whether we are saying it seriously or sarcastically, we need to stop saying “I/he/she/we/they have peaked.”

For starters, using the term about someone else is unnecessary. This goes back to the classic line you hear in elementary school, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Sure, sometimes we don’t intentionally use this term in a malicious way. However, there is nothing to gain from forming an unfair opinion on someone else’s personal timeline and success.

Ultimately, forming judgments about the people around us can only negatively affect us. For example, when I arrived back to BU this fall, I constantly was asking and answering the “how was your summer” question.

Especially among my COM colleagues, the most popular response to this was an overview of their summer internship. Almost everyone I talked to seemed to have fallen in love with their internship and were eager to share stories from their experiences.

Here’s the thing, I never once thought to myself that any of them were peaking (obviously by the title of this blog, you know I don’t believe in this). However, I did begin to doubt my own capabilities. As someone who learned a lot from their internship but did not necessarily fall in love with it, I was intimidated, even a bit jealous. I so badly wished I could have come back feeling confident in what I wanted to pursue after college, or even next summer.

My point in sharing this is to highlight that even when we are not directly stating that someone else has “peaked,” the peaking mindset can creep in. By this, I mean that I compared myself to others and let their experiences and success make me wish that I had done better or enjoyed myself more.

Therefore, the biggest flaw with the peaking conspiracy is that it causes us to compare ourselves to others’ success, timelines, goals, experiences, etc.

When I have overheard peers or friends use the term “peaking” about themselves, it has usually been in a comedic, sarcastic way. Their tone should make it easy to laugh with them, and for a moment maybe we do. However, even if the conversation only lasts a mere moment, I have noticed an underlying self-critical inclination in their voice and viewpoint.

We tend to look back at our accomplishments and sense that we have peaked when we currently feel like we are at a low point. If we did truly believe peaking exists, wouldn’t that be incredibly disappointing? What else would we have to look forward to? Again, the peaking mindset takes over and whether we are kidding or not, it can alter our motivation, mood and self-confidence.

Rather than comparing ourselves to others or mocking our own prior personal success, we should celebrate others’ success and let it inspire us. We should recognize our own strengths and accomplishments, regardless of their magnitude.

One of the most authentic things we can do is to simply be ourselves. There is no right or wrong timeline to follow. There is so much to learn from those around us, so instead of comparing yourself to others, congratulate them on their victories and continue pushing forward until you have your own.

At times, we may feel like we are peaking, but this implies that we are about to start heading on a downward slope. Work on changing your vantage point. Accept yourself, set goals, take your time, ask for help, don’t give up. Continuous effort and perseverance does not mean you are failing, it means you’re making progress.

There’s lots of mountains to climb so let’s stop declaring when we are peaking and assuming that this can only happen once. The descent down requires just as much energy as the ascent upwards. So let’s appreciate the journey.

Remy: 6 Lessons on How to be Successful in COM as Told by ‘Friends’ Characters

COM is about developing communication skills, learning by doing and discovering career paths. Like the pitch of the hit sitcom Friends, “It’s about a time in your life when everything is possible, which is really exciting and really scary.” It’s about searching for your passions. And it’s about building relationships, because when you’re trying to succeed, everyone can benefit from mentors, and of course, friends.

  • Rachel- Build your confidence. Rachel works hard to become a successful businesswoman. Her character proves that confidence does not always start from within; sometimes, you need a boost from your friends.

In COM, it’s overwhelming to be thrown into an environment where everyone seems confident about what they are doing. Rather than letting this intimidate you, remember that your confidence can be shaped by those around you. Find role models, ask questions, introduce yourself to professors – confidence comes with time!

  • Ross- Find what you’re passionate about (and be proud of it)! Few characters cared at all about paleontology, but Ross did not let this prevent him from pursuing his passion. His intelligence and genuinity made him a respectable, lovable guy.

“What are you passionate about?” can be a scary question. It is okay to not have an answer right now! Whether it’s Mass Communication, Film and TV, Advertising and Marketing, or Public Relations- try it out and find what you love. Passionate energy is contagious in COM.

  • Monica- Proactivity pays off. Monica’s obsessive cleaning and organization provided laughs throughout all 236 episodes of the series. More importantly, her independence and competitive edge allowed her to persevere as a chef, and eventually open her own restaurant.

COM is not just about the courses. Take advantage of the resources available to you…AdLab, PRLab, WTBU, BUTV10, BU News Service, or Hothouse Productions. Meet with faculty advisors and COM career services. Attend workshops and events. All of these people and opportunities are here to help you succeed.

  • Chandler- Don’t take yourself too seriously. Chandler’s wit and sarcasm were unparalleled. Ultimately, Chandler’s ability to laugh at himself allowed him to find success in his personal life and career.

The late nights editing your film project, creating a PR plan, or writing a slogan for an ad project can be stressful. However, remember not to take yourself too seriously! Every project and course is a learning experience, no one expects you to be perfect.

  • Joey- Have fun. Joey was constantly searching for work as a struggling actor. Despite this, he always had a smile on his face. His warm hearted personality and positivity made him an amazing worker and friend.

Yes, COM requires hard work, but it also has its own specific school spirit that makes getting involved exciting. Check the calendar and weekly COM emails because there is always events going on, such as movie screenings, open houses, employer events, friends and family weekends, the list goes on.

  • Phoebe- Be yourself! Phoebe is remembered for her quirkiness and eccentric personality. Her original song “Smelly Cat” and below-average guitar playing was a staple of show. Phoebe was an irreplaceable character because she was unapologetically herself.

COM welcomes and encourages individuality. The reason COM has such a vibrant, stand-out community, is because each student and faculty member brings something unique to the group. All you have to do is be yourself!