Marriage and Law School

My first impression of law school was it would be full of single people, but to my surprise there is a healthy sized range of age, experiences, and statuses. There are students in their early to mid-20s, students closer to my age in their late 20s/early 30s, and slightly older. Some students are in relationships ranging from new love to well-established commitments and others are married like me. There are few with children too. It is rather reassuring to see such a range of people with different backgrounds and relationship statuses because I was initially concerned with being the outlier. No one treats me differently because I am married or even looks at me strangely for it.

Being married in law school isn’t as unusual or stirs up as many odd stares as I thought it would. There have been a few people with raised eyebrows and incredulous eyes ponder my ability to make such a commitment or how such a commitment would even last during this tough year. People warn me of the rocky road ahead for relationships because of the workload, the lack of time for your significant other, and the inability to really connect with him/her when you do have time. While the workload and law school commitment can and is intense, my relationship hasn’t felt any significant strain. There are days where my husband expresses how much he misses spending time with me or where our few minutes together each night before we fall asleep feels too brief, but we both understood law school would mean less time to spend together.

On the social side, being married affects me only because I prefer to go home after school than go to bar review or attend many social events. I already spend so little time with my husband that if I were to have free time, I’m compelled to spend it with him. Some of my much more socially active friends have suggested bringing him to these bar reviews, and I have brought him to a few events. It isn’t so much he is forbidden or discouraged to attend law school social events but rather, we value time with just each other. We ensure the spare time is used to keep us connected.

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