There’s a song that Chris Tomlin sings that is one of my favorite worship songs. It’s called “Lord, I Need You” and it goes something like this:
Lord, I come, I confess
Bowing here I find my rest
Without You I fall apart
You’re the One that guides my heart
Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
Where sin runs deep Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are, Lord, I am free
Holiness is Christ in me
Holiness is Christ in me. That line has always stuck with me. Something about it stirs something deep within my soul. I feel uneasy and yet at the same time I feel peace. Uneasy, because of its weight; Peace, because of its simplicity. I am called to holiness. And that’s huge. It makes me uncomfortable to think about how big of a call that is for my life. Me? Holy? Christ within me? That’s too hard! I’m not ready for that! The beautiful part, though, is how simple it is. Holiness does not come with a huge list of things to check off before you can say confidently “That’s it! I finished everything! I’m holy!” No one would ever be able to reach holiness because the list would be endless and every time you messed up you would have to start over. Humans aren’t perfect, and we never will be. Holiness seems like a lot of pressure, but it doesn’t have to be. It’s as simple as “Christ in me.” What does that mean?
One day last semester, when I was praying, I was filled with a beautiful image. Christ was showing me my heart. It was ugly and covered in dirt and cement, so much so that it wasn’t even distinguishable as a heart. I imagined Christ telling me that this was my heart and the cement and dirt were my doubts, and hurt, and fears. Then He covered it with His other hand and squeezed gently. The cement crumbled to dust and a breeze blew it away. Then He held out His hand and showed me again. Sitting there was a small, withered heart. It looked so sad. He told me to stop worrying about trying so hard to be holy by loving like Him; that my heart was too small to hold that much love. Then He leaned down and kissed that little heart and told me that He would hold it tight and to focus on letting Him love me. I asked Him what I supposed to do now. And thats when He reached into His chest and took His beating heart and gave it to me. And He told me, “Let me love for you.”
Holiness is Christ in me. Holiness is letting God love you, and letting God love for you. Holiness does not require “doing.” There’s nothing you can do to be holy. Holiness is “letting.” When I allow Christ to love for me, all of the pressure is off me. All I have to do is step aside. I strive every day to allow God to love the world through me; to see the world through God’s beating heart. It is by no means easy, but it’s incredibly simple.
St. Paul says it perfectly in Galatians: “It is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me.”
And that, my friends, is holiness.