I have now been back with my parents in New Jersey for a week now. Seven days. It has honestly just now occurred to me that roughly seven days ago, just 168 hours ago, just 10080 minutes ago – each minute being only a brief moment in time – I was just arriving back to the home I grew up in after a long day of cleaning out my room in the Engineering House and singing way too many songs in a five-hour car ride.
It’s crazy how just a little over a day before that, I was preparing on going out to dinner with my girlfriend and finally getting a moments rest after a long semester.
And roughly 14 hours earlier that day – Thursday morning at 4am – I was just finishing my final programming assignment and preparing to hand it in and complete my semester before finally being able to exit Photonics and travel home.
As I have experienced my heart, mind, and soul decelerate from hundreds of miles per hour to an almost full stop, I can’t help but for a moment reflect on a heart, mind, and soul’s journey through time.
It doesn’t really matter what the velocity your soul is moving at each day.
Fast
or
slow,
it is all relative to time,
and
time
keeps
pacing
the same.
And each moment is exactly that: a moment. And at each moment, our states of being are affected by those around us.
Sometimes, the effects that others have on our states are positive. Sometimes, not so much.
Sometimes, the impacts on our states are small. Other times, they are massive, potentially affecting the trajectory of our being in massive, eternal ways.
Sometimes, another soul only crosses our paths for a brief moment.
And other times, their existences are almost permanent.
And if we are lucky, some of those individuals who impact us in massive positive ways are also people who have a more permanent existence in our lives.
But sometimes, loss and farewells do occur. Our existences are finite – only moments in time.
And, can we honestly, ever, really expect complete permanence in those that we cherish?
I find there are many ways we can respond to our finitude,
either with fear,
anxiety,
or distance.
Or, we can respond to our existence with both
a sense of courage,
and
a sense of thankfulness for existence.
And truly, in the present moment, we can cherish our existences – because that is our only guarantee.
And we can courageously know that, loss and pain do occur, but that doesn’t mean we cannot have love and hope, and it most certainly doesn’t mean we cannot love our existences and those around us.
And also, we can make sure that those who have had impacts on our lives know that we are thankful we have had the blessing of having them cross our paths in time.
And so, thank you to my fellow Marshians.
Thank you Ian, you one time wrote that I had courage, but I it is only thanks to the kindness and support from you and others. You are one of the most other-aware individuals I have ever met, and I am most certainly sure that wherever you go, you will continue to bring a massive and positive impact on those around you.
Thank you Kasey, your humor, and your passion for justice has been an inspiration to me. Thank you for the many memories in the community dinners at Marsh Chapel, and at our Monday night dinners. Your spirit and heart always brought a wonderful dynamic to our community, and your passion and heart will be a blessing to the Northwest Immigrant Rights Project.
Thank you Denise, Devin, Matt, and Tom. Your persistence in my life has been a blessing, and I always looked forward to laughing, talking, and hanging out with you on Sunday mornings, and on Monday nights. Your hearts and our conversations filled me with life and courage that carried me through the stresses of the semester. Thank you to the rest of the Marsh community, and thank you to my mentors and leaders. Our conversations were a regular retreat from my day to day challenges, and your thought-provoking conversations that challenged me to change are still impacting me today. I cannot wait to see you all again next semester.
Thank you to the Sojourn community. Our conversations as an eclectic bunch were life-giving, and the community you have given me is something I cannot wait to return to this summer and over the next semester.
Thank you to EpiscopalBU for providing me a time of meditation, fellowship, and community every week. You are all wonderful people, and something I always looked forward to on Wednesday evenings after a long day of classes.
Thank you to my friends from Orientation. Thank you my friends from Engineering. Thank you to my professors this semester who gave me assistance when I struggled and who spoke with me regularly. Thank you to every friend I have made and every new wonderful person in my life.
I don’t even know how to close a sentimental blog post. To those who are moving on to the next chapters in their lives and to those I have had to say goodbye to: thank you – I honestly am unsure if I can put into language the impacts you have had on me as a person. And to those I will see again in September, or in a week, thank you so much for a wonderful semester. I look forward to many more conversations, fellowship, and moments together.
Thank you, God, for each and every moment I have had on this earth. Thank you for the tough moments, and for the bright moments. Thank you for the heartbeat I have in my chest, and the air in my lungs. Thank you for those I have been blessed to know.
Thank you.