Josee: Crutches on Commonwealth Ave: Surviving College as a Chronic Klutz

Most freshman look back at FYSOP (First Year Student Outreach Project) with an air of nostalgia. From wistful memories of budding friendships to the invigorating excitement of service for one’s new community, FYSOP was a time of fast-paced acceleration into the world of college. Apparently for me, it was also a time for fast-paced acceleration into a wall.

To this day, I can still see the impression my head left on that fateful day in Tower A. I like to point it out to my friends as we pass by. With a beaming smile, I turn and tell them how it only took two days to leave my MARK on the school.

No one laughs.

Part of me wondered if that was my final encounter with the gods of physical imbalance but we all know that’s a thought too good to be true. So here’s my first piece of advice for freshman year, don’t run into walls. Harry Potter misled you. Platform 9 and ¾ is not on the other side, only a fateful trip to Student Health Services.

Another recommendation is to avoid the metal grates and metal plates that line the sidewalks on Comm. Ave. The little buggers are everywhere and if you aren’t paying enough attention on a rainy day, you may be out of luck and find your keister a bit damp.

Protip: Crutches can be your downfall, literally. Last semester, I hurt my foot and had crutches for a grand total of 26 hours until I slid on a metal plate. Although it seemed like a moment of woe, I pride myself for winning the award for most appropriate time to sing “And now I’m lying on the cold hard ground.” I’m still waiting on my trophy for that one.

My final piece of experiential wisdom goes out to those who like fancy footwear. Since your shoes are the only things keeping you from the ground, keep in mind that function may trump fashion. A good sturdy pair of snow boots will help keep you upright on those slippery days. And I speak from experience when I say that heels and cobblestone are absolute enemies.

Now I know you’re probably thinking, why is Josee telling us these tales of woe?
It’s because things happen. Things go wrong, walls get run into, and falling can become a common issue. What matters is whether you stay down and let the problem run its number on you or you get back up and keep moving on. Freshman year is full of challenges. Once you meet them, you learn not only how to handle them, but embrace them as snafus that helped shape who you are.

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